Category Archives: READ OF THE WEEK

READ OF THE WEEK!!! YOU LITTLE BISH!!! KHLOE KARDASHIAN ADMITS TO FAKING FERTILITY ISSUES ON NEW SEASON ON #KUWTK

THIS STORY REALLY JUST COOKED MY RICE!!! Now everybody knows i love my Kardashians and you can judge your mother! But i like them however Khloe, after this stunt you skallywag don’t be coming back bout round Cleveland no more! 

So in the trailer for the next season of #KUWTK, Khloe admits to faking her fertility issues due to her “situation” with Lamar Odom, her ex husband for y’all who don’t keep up. That’s what I’m here for. 

Now you remember back when the show was actually good Khloe and Lammy were cute and cuddly and happy and trying so hard to have a baby. The world was on this “we’re rooting for Baby Khlomar” kick, she illicited sympathy and everything and now you come out and say you were faking the treatments. And bitch this was your story line for at least 4 seasons!!! I’m just so disgusted! 

It’s not even the fact that you lied about it cause hey it’s yo coo-coo if you wanna lie on it, that’s between you and it! But the fact that you sit up here and say “my situation with Lamar.” So does that mean the relationship was always bad. Cause you got married what 3 week after meeting? Flag number 1! And you wanna make a spinoff CONTINUING to perpetuate the fact that you couldn’t get pregnant! There are women out here who would KILL for the fertility treatment you alleged to have and you just playing with your uterus! 

AND THEN BITCH WAIT!!! E! NEWS POSTED A STORY SAYING THAT YO NEW MAN TRISTAN THOMAS OR WHAT-THE-HELL-EVER WANTS YOU TO HAVE 5 KIDS!!! NOW I’M REALLY MAD! AND YOU GONE SIT YO RAGGEDY ASS IN OUR ARENA. NOW I SEE WHY CLEVELAND WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH YO ASS! SHE DONE FUCKED AROUND AND PISSED ME OFF AT 5 AM! 

Anyway y’all can move Khloe down your list of favorite Kardashians and move her up on the most dispised! 

I love you for reading! 

Xoxoxo

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READ OF THE WEEK! BITTER ASS AUNT VIV #1 JANET HUBERT

As I sit on this Read Of The Week and try to find witty puns and things to say, this hefer is such an easy read she’s making this easy. Now for all my new millennia’s lemme give y’all some background then we gone get to reading. The woman you see above is Janet Hubert also known as Aunt Viv #1 from the very popular 90 sitcom The Fresh Prince of Bel Air staring Will Smith. So back in the day Janet was recasted due to her BIG MOUTH and trying to start a revolt against Will Smith all in the name of some extra coins! So, in comes light skinned and if you ask me, substantially less funny Aunt Viv! So there’s your history lesson for today. Now lets reads!

So the  picture was posted by Alfonso Ribeiro on Facebook of the cast of the Fresh Prince in their current state. Everybody looks great btw. But of course bitter betty Janet Hubert was not having it. And I blame social media to an extent cause had some of us not been sending her this photo constantly asking her what she thinks about it, she might’ve kept her mouth shut and avoided this read but since she didn’t, let’s go.

She said, and this isn’t verbatim but imma sum it up. “There can’t be a reunion without any UNION” and then goes on to READ THE DOG FUCK OUT OF CARLTON saying he was stuck to Will’s ass light glue in the sun and kissing more ass than a little bit! So my gag is, why is Carlton the only one you called out?

The fact that you take no spite with the chick who actually replaced yo ass is just laughable to me. And you have grounds because you were the better of the two Aunt Vivs but SIS this bitter, shit 40+ year old feud is TIRED, THROUGH AND DELAYED!!! You more pressed than a rented tuxedo in May! And I probably wouldn’t be so into this read had you not tried to drag my girl Lovelyti from YouTube the way you did when she did that video about you a while back; yea I don’t forget shit!

Now she talmbout she wants to truth to come out about what went down with the show. GIRL WHAT ELSE DO WE NEED TO KNOW. YOU BIT THE HAND THAT FED YOU, SO THEY GAVE YO FOOD TO SOMEBODY ELSE! It’s Hollywood honey, shit happens everyday! LET IT GO ELSA!!! You 61 years old! I imagine you have grandkids and hell the way kids having kids nowadays you might even have great grandkids! Go let them enjoy your legacy and quit making these kids down to the schoolhouse tease them about they bitter Grandma Janet that can’t catch a break with a glove the size of Pluto! OK! Now I’m not gone talk to you no more sis!

I love you for reading!!!

X0X0X0

 

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READ OF THE WEEK: NICKI MINAJ…. OR ROMAN…. MARTHA…. SOMEBODY!!!!

SOMEBODY PLEASE SUMMON ROMAN CAUSE NICKI AIN’T GOT IT IN HER NO MORE! Girl did you hear this new Nicki record featuring Turtle Neck and DragShow “No Frauds” Chile she could’ve kept that! As far as that song being a “response” to a now LEGENDARY diss record, honey you take another L! BUT!!! If you want something I can twerk to and they can play on the radio, sis you get a W for that. But we know that’s all you check for is numbers and things anyway so yea.

So Nicki took a while two weeks of my life, tootsie rolled around Paris looking like Futurama Lil Kim, shots some photos and then delivers this song with two other singles! Btw Beyoncé is the ONLY bitch that can release more than one single and get my attention, (just due to my own attention span so shade Nicki.) I couldn’t get through, “Changed It” cause y’all know how I feel about Lil Wayne. My tolerance is LOW. I’m actually listening to that “Regret In Your Tears” as I type this and she better drag Mickey Mouse (Meek Mills for y’all just joining us) in this song! I like this song! So I guess 1/3 ain’t bad. I can see myself bumping this in the car!

So all in all, Nicki sis I suggest you find Roman OOH and how the hell you gone give Remy 72 hours to reply and it took you a WHOLE PAY PERIOD to make a whack response!!! And somebody tell her to stop making that annoying ass bird noise! I’m done shit, Nicki honey I’m going to listen to Itty Bitty Piggy and reminisce on yester years. Let’s chat later. And y’all know

I love you for reading!!

X0X0X0

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READ OF THE WEEK: CASH ME OUSIDE GIRL!!

Now these microwave/Instagram celebrities I normally don’t give the time a day. Because usually just like their rise, they fall just as quick. But I’m so SICK of this “cash me ouside” chick!!!
Sis I don’t even know this little girl name but I tell you what. The hood white girl quota is filled! And she’s not even good at it! But that’s not why she’s getting the prestigious “READ OF THE WEEK!” She getting it because of her statement regarding Kylie Jenner!
So she doing a radio interview…. Which leads me to another question. WHY ARE WE BOOKING THIS CLOWN TO DO RADIO INTERVIEWS AS IF SHE ACTUALLY HAS SOMETHING CREDIBLE TO SAY BESIDES THAT TACKY CATCH PHRASE OF HERS? Anyway excuse me, I’ve seem to lost my way. On the radio she says she doesn’t like Kylie and believes she’s an attention whore. HELLO POT! I’D LIKE TO INTRODUCE YOU TO MY FRIEND KETTLE! Then she goes further and begins talking about Kylie transformation just plain dogging her for no reason at all but the fact that she’s jealous!
Now I normally don’t read kids but sis you had it coming. I suggest while you have this very small platform, you do something constructive with it. Because “cash me ouside” ain’t gone play the bills for the rest of your life. And to social media, STOP MAKING FOOLS LIKE THIS BELIEVE THEY ACTUALLY HAVE SOMETHING GOING FOR THEMSELVES. She wouldn’t be as popular if we weren’t gassing her up! Notice I didn’t mention her name ONCE you wanna know why, CAUSE I DON’T KNOW IT!! She’s nothing more than the “cash me ouside” girl and she will be that forever if she don’t do something productive with her tacky ass life!
I love you for reading!
X0X0X0
PS
WHERE THE HELL IS HER MAMA?!

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READ OF THE WEEK: FUTURE VS. RUSSELL WILSON “WHO’D YOU RATHER!?”

I’m so sick of this foolishness. Now ya’ll know I don’t discuss any sports or anything of that nature here UNLESS it merges into the mess of pop culture and this weekend it did so I must talk! And Imma try to get this right so for ya’ll who are sports fans, correct me when I say something wrong.

So the Atlanta Falcons….and Seattle Seahawks (I think I got them two right) any who so Russell Wilson plays for the Seahawks and they were in the NFC (National Football Conference…whatever that is) and they lost! So you know Ciara and Baby Future were in the building cheering on Daddy but GUESS WHO ELSE SHOWED THEY UGLY FACE DOWN TO THE FOOTBAL FIELD! BIG FUTURE! Now Black Twitter, being as resourceful as they are did some digging and brought up some interesting points. The largest being what I’m about to tell ya’ll about.  WHENEVER FUTURE IS AS A SPORTING EVENT, RUSSELL USUALLY LOOSES THE GAME!
Now I can’t tell you nothing about no stats and things of that nature cause I don’t know and quite frankly, I don’t care! However people are saying the Russell is constantly taking L’s whenever Future is around! And I’m looking at these people like, EXCUSE ME! LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THE BIGGER PICTURE HERE!

Future’s youngest son is currently calling Russell Dad! His ex-fiancé is currently as well calling Russell DADDY!!! In the coins department Russell is worth 14M while Future is worth 8M. Both very lucrative but I’m just here to give the numbers you do with them what you will. RUSSELL CAN’T TAKE AN L TO FUTURE!!!! The ONLY way for him to do that is for Ciara to file for divorce and go back to Future (which I don’t think is EVER happening) even though she did drop that 15M lawsuit against him but I think Russell just gave her the money and said here go buy something nice!

Anywho, STOP THE MADNESS! Congratulations to Atlanta for winning whatever the NFC is and congratulations to Ciara and Russell for being the sexiest couple I’ve seen in a while. And Future….go have a seat! You aint got that kinda power!

I love you for reading!

X0X0X0

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READ OF THE WEEK: Kim Burrell SLAMS LGBT COMMUNITY and BACK PEDDLES INTO A LAKE OF SHADE AND READS!

It aint even a full 12 hours off into the new year…oh before I get to reading…. HAPPY NEW YEAR LIBRARIANS!!!! Wishing you everything good and prosperous this year. Let’s slay 2017! Ok now that I’ve said that, let’s get into this chick!

So, first of all, when you say Kim Burrell name, nothing comes to mind. I mean you know her name but for me, she’s not my style of gospel to listen to so No I don’t know who the hell she is or one song she’s made. HOWEVER, she made some statement about the LGBT community and there is NO WAY I’m just gonna let this slide without an old-fashioned read!

Little known fact about your Librarian. I grew up in a Baptist church. You know the ones who have something every day of the week and then on Sunday, you spent a whole working shift at church! Yea that was me from about birth, until maybe 13 or 14 when my parents allowed me to start making my own decisions. I say all that to say this, I know a little something about a bible and Kim lemme just say this for you and the rest of the homophobic bible thumpers. Don’t throw a bible at somebody without snatching out the few pages for yourself! Roll the clip of what she had to say and then let’s get back into the read!

So, Kim sis…. all the homosexuals are gone die in 2017 huh…. just all of them or a select few…??? I just wanna know. I’m usually very objective in situations like this and give the party I’m reading the benefit of the doubt. In this case I was looking for the entire clip because we work in the world-wide web; where someone could’ve very well took the parts of her sermon and clip them together to make her look like this evil whore. However, sis, I couldn’t find ANYTHING so I have to go off what I witnessed and from what I witnessed, YOU ARE A HOMOPHOBIC HYPROCRIT.

Now my homegirl Lovelyti hipped me to this story cause had she not, I wouldn’t have known about this shit. She tells me your going on Ellen on the 5th Kim…. Do you know that Ellen is a proud member of the LGBT community? Or does that not matter because she has a platform from which you can benefit so you’ll sit and kiki with her. AND ANOTHER THING TI TOLD ME. While Frank Oceans was building stairways to heaven, you were singing on one of the tracks on his album. Now he aint came out and said it verbatim but we can put two and two together. You saw NO problem working with him. These are the same people you classified as “PERVERTED”.

AND THE WORST PART IS YOU ISSUED THIS WHACK ASS STATEMENT…. GIRL LISTEN TO THIS!

THAT is what we call back peddling?! You said it now, it’s out, now let’s deal with it. I have NO PROBLEM with what you said. Because at the end of that days that’s your opinion. I would be a hypocrite to sit behind this screen and read yo ass if I had a problem with you expressing yourself and clearly that’s what I’m doing RIGHT DAMN NOW! What I do have a problem with is the mentality of Christians like you who feel a need to condemn this ONE SIN and then in the next breath say, “All sins are equal!” Now if I had the time and energy I would do some digging in your life but you know your sin and God knows that’s all who really needs to know. It’s the “selective” Christians that I can’t with, that wanna throw rocks in a glass house. I don’t quote scripture cause I usually get it wrong, but there’s one that comes to mind. The one about “he who is without sin cast the first stone” or something like that.

Lemme close cause I done reached almost 700 words on this woman. Kim, you work in Hollywood, you can’t throw a rock and not hit someone apart of the LGBT community. I can almost guarantee SOMEONE you employee is a member of the LGBT community. I suggest the next time you and any other of your selective Christian friends decide to throw those rocks, aim carefully and make sure they aren’t rubber. That’s all! And as always YOU KNOW

I LOVE YOU FOR READING!

X0X0X0

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READ OF THE WEEK: Brandy’s Little Brother….Ray J! (Diss Track INSIDE)

COME HERE BOY! Did you really think this read was gone escape you sir! Ya’ll PLEASE for the LIFE of me give me one good reason why I shouldn’t tear Ray J a new one for this “diss track” she released last night. And yes, I said “SHE” that wasn’t a typo. Ok so here, go listen first and then come on back for this READ OF THE WEEK!

Ok so before I just drag him and her character personally let’s discuss the actual track her released. Beyond that fact that Brandy must’ve said she is NOT funding this foolishness, the track came out of NOWHERE! Timing is very important in this business and for me that’s what I’m looking at. Less than 12 hours after Kanye was admitted to the hospital, you decide to release a diss track. Of course, so you can get a little more traction for the trash. Because Lord knows, aint NOBODY checking for new Ray J music. Not even Chris Brown could help you! And he needs his ass whooped for even wanting parts in this foolishness. What he give you for that verse Chris? One of them scooty bikes he selling?

Now here’s background tea. So, he released this song in response to Kanye’s “Famous” video where he was portrayed naked in the bed amongst a bunch of other people. Now the gag is, I listened to the song and there weren’t many jabs at Kanye…. MOST of the shots were taking at Kim?! So, Ray J I have to ask, why you still talking about Kim?! It’s sound to me like your beef is with her as opposed to Ye! AND HE THE ONE WHO MADE THE VIDEO WITH YO NAKED ASS IN IT!

Ok so you feel like you made her famous. Let’s look at the timeline shall we. So, the sex tape was filmed in 2003, released in 2007, Ray J’s biggest hit was 2005 “One wish”, Keeping Up with The Kardashians premiered in 2007. So, if she wanted to be famous, I would’ve released it when your career was actually popping…. well pop (just one pop). Not to mention, we was clocking Kim Kardashian when she was BFF’n it around LA with Paris Hilton so…. hell, I didn’t even know ya’ll dated UNTIL the sex tape so LET’S STOP THE YOU MADE HER AND HER FAMILY FAMOUS! YOU DON’T POSSES ENOUGH AMOUNT OF FAM TO MAKE ANYBODY FAMOUS!

And for that matter, the people you manage don’t even get traction in the industry! SO, BOY STOP IT!

The beef you have, is with Kanye but in order to stay relevant you just HAVE to constantly mention Kim. I get it. But quit trynna drag her like you didn’t have your face buried in her box too! And at the end of the record you say you got a wife now and you happy…. clearly you aint or you would be fucking her and not worried about Kim and her Kooty Kat!

I’m done dragging this clown. The bottom line is Ray J is mad because he thought the sex tape would give BOTH some life and instead she’s turned it into WAAAAYYYY more than he could EVER. Where is that mother of yours to stop you from releasing bullshit like this. While she was hell bent on you not marrying Princess. And if she any kinda woman she would wanna know why you constantly bringing up a TEN-YEAR-OLD RELATIONSHIP!!!

Anyway, I’m done, lemme know what yall know about this mess down below and you know like always

I love you for reading

X0X0X0

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